Wednesday 27 January 2010

John Niven - Kill Your Friends

"It’s not dog-eat-dog around here...it's dog-gang-rapes-dog-then-tortures-him-for-five-days-before-burying-him-alive-and-taking-out-every-motherfucker-the-dog-has-ever-known."

And so the cover blurb of John Niven's Kill Your Friends describes the music industry circa 1997. Now I hate to use this word for the second time this month, however - 1997 was when 'Britpop' was at its commercial peak and it's up against this backdrop we find Steven Stelfox, an A&R man at an unspecified record label who will go to any lengths to get ahead - the book's body count is perhaps more impressive than Stelfox's chart positions.

One of the least likable lead characters you will ever come across, Stelfox is a man not driven by a passion for music but class 'A's, 'Rockschools' (JD and coke), prostitutes and pornography. In fact it's fair to say that he has no real affinity to music at all (which anyone who has ever been in a band will probably think is the norm for an A&R man), viewing it as a means to obtain all the above. Put a sure-fire hit in front of him next to a guaranteed turkey and he's likely to pick the latter (but ensuring he can make it look like someone else's fault when the record fails).

Niven had worked in the music industry for 12 years, which does worryingly suggest that much of this book might be drawn from personal experience. On publication Kill Your Friends was continually compared to American Psycho. A fair comparison, but these reviewers were perhaps missing the clues that Niven comes across as a fan of Bret Easton Ellis as a whole; the frequent roll-call of celebrities (albeit mainly z-list, long-forgotten indie musicians) similarly recalls Glamorama.

A great book that can potentially be read in a couple of sittings, Kill Your Friends might put off anyone seriously considering a career in the music business (particularly any young women eyeing up that secretarial position as a way in before becoming a scout).

Currently reading: Jay McInerney - The Last Bachelor

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